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How To Socialize At Holiday Parties -- Even If You Are Shy

Question:

I'm quite shy around people I don't know. What can I do to relax and enjoy myself at holiday parties?


You don't have to be a wallflower just because you don't know many guests at a party. Start by asking your hostess in advance if there's anyone she thinks you should meet, and then ask her to introduce you when that person arrives. Another way is to look for a group of people that seem to be friendly -- smile and ask if you can join them, and introduce yourself.

Keep the conversation light. If you're worried that you have nothing to say to people, you can plan some conversation starters ahead before you go -- try watching the news or reading reviews of movies or books for ideas of things to talk about. If you find yourself in the middle of an awkward pause, ask the other person a question (open-ended is best) using the holiday as a convo starter -- such as how do they know the hosts, if they have any special holiday plans, their most recent holiday vacation, etc. -- or make a sincere compliment. Steer clear of potentially touchy subjects such as politics. If you hit it off with your new friends, and you would like to stay in touch, request to exchange phone numbers or email addresses.

Some other good party etiquette rules to follow: Arrive on time -- this way you'll get to mingle with people on a one-to-one basis and it gives you time to warm up. Don't eat while you're socializing, and stick to one drink for the night. Remember, holiday parties are a time when everyone is full of good cheer, so relax and enjoy yourself and you'll be the kind of person others want to be around!



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